"The secret of life is to fall seven times and to get up eight times." — Paulo Coelho
Welcome to the brutal truth, my friend. Failure is part of life. You're going to experience it. It's part of the process of growth and evolution.
Look I'm just being honest. And the sooner you accept that the better off you'll be. Wouldn't it be terrible if that's how your coach really talked to you? Then why do you do this to yourself? You spend the most time with YOURSELF, learn how to be fucking nice okay?
Failure is looked at as a monster that we need to avoid and feel ashamed of. In the world of entrepreneurship that is probably one of the scariest and dirtiest words, you can utter in conversation. At least when you first start. But if you ask any of the most successful people in this world, they will tell you it's part of the process. It's like the shin splints. Sucks, but means you're growing. Here's my best advice for the moments you're looking failure straight in the eye.
Bitch, I love you.
I read somewhere that really intelligent people cuss a lot and I've been holding onto that sentiment for dear life. Because I like the edge I feel when I drop an f-bomb. ANYWAYS let's get back to it. Failure is inevitable, right? And life experience is about perspective, yes? So on the days you feel like you're failing ask yourself, what is the perspective I can take on this? Failed sale? What lessons did you learn? Failed business? Look inward, what went wrong? Not ready to give up on it? How would you do it differently if you tried again? Now, what's stopping you from trying again? Relationship in the shitter? Is this your person? Why? How are they enriching your life? Or are you crying over Mr wrong while Mrs right is off meeting someone else? Sometimes the only thing we can do is change our perspective, find gratitude for an experience, pick up the pieces and try again.
Would you really change it if you knew that it going any differently meant you wouldn't be successful? Does that even make sense?
Everything that has happened in your life has gotten you here. How often have you gotten to the other side of hurt, struggle, and things were better than you expected? Like if you hadn't gotten fired you wouldn't have found the job where you met your best friend. Who in turn showed you a career path you didn't consider before.. It's easy to look back and say, I'm glad it didn't work out how I'd hoped because what I have now is so much better. It's not easy to realize it in the moment. But in a moment where you feel like you failed, recognized it might only be a nudge for slight redirection. And that the Universe is conspiring FOR you. Not against you.
Finally, the thing I recommend most if you're facing the heartache and disappointment of failure... surround yourself with inspiration. Listen to the audiobooks of people who have rags-to-riches stories. Go on social media and look at who your idols follow, and follow the people they do. And most importantly, let people love you. Don't hide. Share with others what you're walking through because connection and community bring opportunity and hope. Anyways, love you. xoxo